At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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