You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize