I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
you inspire me to be a worse person
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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