I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
