Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
