If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
