do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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