you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
