I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
