You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
