so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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