They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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