It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
