Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
