and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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