he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
