I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
