So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
