Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Randomize
