Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Randomize