thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
