Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
There's always time for handjobs
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
All the doctor said was why
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Pooping to opera.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
