overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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