Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
