"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
All of them.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.