I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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