I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize