i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
