Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
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Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
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Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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