I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
