Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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