I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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