Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman

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(775): View more from Nevada

Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink

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(912): View more from Georgia

well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.

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(850): View more from Florida

I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?

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(815): View more from Illinois

My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy

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(417): View more from Missouri

Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.

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(987): View more from

Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.

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(847): View more from Illinois

Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T

(603): View more from New Hampshire

If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does

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