Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize