are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize