No, you can still breathe under the balls.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
