You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
