I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
