Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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