I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
