i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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