Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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