I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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