This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
