This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
