I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
