I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
we're so committed to being not committed
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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