Pants 0. Shit 1.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
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