More tranny stories later!
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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