you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize